The End of Moms Journey

HI Merry Band,

Thanks for giving me a shot in the arm, Susan. I am inspired to post again.
For the last month or so, I have been going up to stay with my Mom, 3 days a week.  Her lung cancer has progressed that she now needs round the clock care.
I have been finding it a very peaceful and loving time.
My body let me know that I am needing to further look after myself. This week I got a bout of deep tissue hives in my  throat and then my lips and face. I am literally disfigured.  So I have arranged for respite care when I am up there for next week. I am getting better at looking after myself and not feeling guilty about it. Yay!
In some ways, I want to stay with her every day until its her time to merge into the nonphysical. but at the moment I need to have the break to be in "my" life with Scotia and my home. I have set aside the time to meet with you all in Uclulet. I feel this is a very nurturing ME thing to do and I am looking forward to it.
peace and love Jennie

opening the heart...

the merry band was in my thoughts as i  travelled thru Egypt, pulling you in as we wandered through ancient sites. under the desert heat, for one brief moment,  i physically experienced my heart opening like a flower, and I realized that opening of the heart is the only way I can  tranform from my "fogginess" that separates me from life and the real me. When my heart opened for that second in time ( it seemed forever, but was only a few seconds), i felt the world as i knew it collapse like an old shell..   in that moment, i felt no fear at all, overwhelmed by awe ( although later when my mind kicked back in, it felt shivers of fear ! ). i realized how all our individual thoughts influence our collective reality, and just by starting to change my thoughts, i could really contribute to creating a new world... it seemed  so simple to think that i had that possibility and i didn't need to be a victim to the gloom and doom about the world ( something i had been fretting about);  later my brain accused me of being Miss Pollyana, but in the "moment of experience" it was so real; the world gloom and doom scenario was wiped away like a whiff of smoke. It was just another illusion...

Miss you all!!  You are in my heart.