Just Do It !!!

Question to myself:   if I am not willing to take action on my awareness, but deliberately return to old patterns,  then I have to wonder why I continue to pursue this "spiritual exploration? I might as well fold up my tent and leave camp.  If I don't act on awareness, then I continue in the mode of "sincere pretending" to myself. I see the strength of discipline as a necessary piece to bring my awareness to some form of fruition. I feel I can somehow side step that piece, as if realization comes up for the sake of it, and takes care of everything, without effort. I feel discipline is the piece I need to wake up within myself. Otherwise, I am only half awake and half listening. On some level, I must still believe that I somehow can't make the shifts. I guess in the end, the motto of "just do it" can be a great antidote to the mental miasma, even if in the moment it makes me feel uncomfortable, annoyed, angry, or whatever....